


Super-Psych-Natural

by reyilese



Category: Psych (TV 2006), Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Not centered around romance, a little bit, but there is romance involved, the psychos interact with team free will, they're all idiots, this is my first fanfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:20:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25938064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reyilese/pseuds/reyilese
Summary: The Winchesters head to Santa Barbara for a case, and meet the local Psychic. Only the psychic isn't really Psychic.Shawn and Gus investigate a murder with Lassie and Jules, but this murder isn't like most murders. What are the FBI doing here??
Relationships: Carlton Lassiter/Shawn Spencer, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 12
Kudos: 63





	1. I Know You Know I'm Lying

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction! I hope you guys enjoy it!

"There's some guy claiming to be psychic in Santa Barbara, California," Sam said. Him and Dean were at a Burger Bar in Texas, looking for a case, as they had been non-stop. 

Dean raised an eyebrow and took a giant bite out of his cheeseburger. "And?"

"Santa Barbara is the self-proclaimed 'Murder Capital of the World'. I think we should check it out; see if there's anything demonic." Sam looked back at his computer. 

"Who's the psychic? Anyone Dad might've known?"

Sam shook his head. "I don't think so. His name is Shawn Spencer. He works for the police department there, and has solved tons of murder cases. He owns an agency called Psych."

"Hm." Dean set down his cheeseburger. "Let's go check it out then!"

-Meanwhile in Santa Barbara-

Shawn and Gus arrived at a crime scene at the same time as Juliet and Lassiter. Shawn immediately noticed that there were marks on the guy's neck, and he was very pale.

Chief Vick walked up to the four. "Stanley Mordachi. He was found this morning. There are no witnesses, and so far no suspects."

"I am sensing that what we're dealing with here is a vampire!" Shawn burst out as he put his fingers to his temple. "The marks on his neck look like a bite mark, and he's very pale, meaning he was drained of all blood!"

Gus' eyes widened slightly before narrowing. "Vampires don't exist, Shawn."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Gus, don't be Randall Peltzer from the Gremlins. This is obviously the work of a vampire."

Lassie huffed and folded his arms across his chest. "Enough of your games, Spencer. The bite mark could've been from before he died."

"But what would've caused him to be so pale?" Juliet asked. 

Chief Vick took a deep breath. "Guys. Woody is going to examine him as soon as we get the body to the office."

Suddenly a black '67 Chevy Impala rolled up to the scene, and two guys in black suits stepped out. 

Shawn's eyes widened. "Dude," he hissed at Gus. "I think those two are the FBI!"

"Can we help you?" Chief asked the two guys in suits.

They both produced badges from inside their coats, and Shawn squinted at them. 

"They're totally the FBI!" He whispered at Gus. 

The shorter one spoke. "I'm FBI Agent Dean De Witt and this is my partner, Sam Zuckerman."

"Wait you mean like the agents from Feds?" Shawn asked. 

Dean narrowed his eyes. "No. Like the agents from real life."

Chief Vick gave Shawn a side-eye before confronting Sam and Dean. "And why is the FBI here?"

This time Sam spoke. "We're here to investigate the murder." He glanced at the dead body behind them, then back at Chief.

"Why? We get murders almost every week. This isn't new."

"Ma'am," Dean interjected. "We don't ask why our director sends us here, and we strongly suggest you don't either. Now. Is there anything strange about the murder?"

"Why don't you go see for yourself?" Lassie said with a snarky tone. 

Chief glared at Lassie. "Show some respect, Detective. It's not often we get the FBI here."

Lassie rolled his eyes and led Sam and Dean to the body. "He was found this morning like this."

Shawn turned himself and Gus away and started speaking in a low voice. "These guys aren't FBI."

"What? How do you know?" Gus asked, his eyebrows furrowed.

"First of all, their names are totally the last names of the agents from Feds. But also they don't act like FBI. They slouch, and their shirts are wrinkled." He glanced at the fake agents for a couple seconds before turning back to Gus. "And the tall dude is carrying a dagger. The shorter one's carrying a shotgun."

Gus glanced back at Sam and Dean as well. "Why would fake FBI agents be here?"

"I don't know, man. Maybe they want to steal money or something." Shawn turned back to the group. "Anyways, as I was saying before De Witt and Zuckerman showed up, Stanley Mordachi was killed by a vampire!" He stuck his fingers to his gums like vampire fangs for effect. 

Dean narrowed his eyes and Sam glanced quickly at Dean. "Vampires?" Dean asked. "Really."

Gus nodded. "He has bite marks on his neck and is drained of blood!"

Chief intervened. "Spencer, Guster, we are in the presence of proffesionals. Please stop messing around!"

"But Chief, I'm a professional too!" Shawn whined.

"Oh be quiet, Spencer," Lassie cut him off. "Let the adults talk."

Sam whispered something to Dean that Shawn didn't catch. 

"I am sensing that you two have a secret that you aren't telling us!" Shawn announced, pointing at Sam and Dean with one hand and doing the finger-to-the-temple with the other hand.

"Sensing?" Dean asked before looking at the chief. "What exactly are these two nutjobs even doing here?"

Chief sighed as Shawn grinned and said, "I'm Psychic Detective Shawn Spencer, and this is my partner, Mr. Clean." Gus folded his arms and smiled like Mr. Clean.

Sam's eyes widened and he whispered something else to Dean. Dean nodded slightly. "So I assume you'll be taking Stanley here to the coroner soon, right?" Dean asked.

Chief nodded. "Meet us at the office in 15 minutes."

Fifteen minutes later, they were all crowded in the Coroner's room around the body. Woody walked in and smiled. As soon as Sam and Dean saw him, they both gave him intense looks of hatred.

"Zachariah," Dean all but growled. "Why are you here?"

Woody's smile disappeared, and he looked at Shawn in confusion, before looking back at the FBI agents. "Who's Zachariah?"

Sam and Dean glanced at each other before looking back at Woody. "Nevermind," Dean said. "We thought you were someone else."

Woody shrugged. "Okay!" He walked over to the head of the table where the body was laying. "Stanley here was drained completely of blood, and the only wound he has is this mark on his neck. Now, most people don't bleed completely out from a simple wound like this, even if it did puncture the artery. The mark looks like a bite, but not any I've seen before. I'm honestly not sure what bit him."

While Woody was talking, Shawn noticed that Sam was whispering to Dean again. He stepped closer to hear what they were saying, and he caught the word "vampire".

After Woody finished speaking, Dean spoke up. "We would like to work on this case with the Psychic and his pal."

Chief Vick narrowed her eyes. "What about Lassiter and O'Hara?" She asked, gesturing to Jules and Lassie.

Dean shook his head. "No. Just the Psychic and Mr. Clean."

"But Lassiter is my head detective!" Chief said. "You can't just exclude him and his partner!"

"Ma'am, with all due respect, I can do whatever I please." Dean and Chief had a mini staring contest.

"Fine," Chief spat. "But if this case isn't solved within 24 hours, I will let Lassiter and O'Hara onto this case."

"Chief!" Lassie exclaimed at the same time Jules said, "But Chief-"

"Not a word. Either of you," Chief said to Lassie and Jules. They both fell silent, and she turned to Sam and Dean. "Get to work." She left the room, and Jules and Lassie followed.

"How fun is this?" Woody asked. "Four guys all working a case together!"

"Woody," Shawn said with a warning tone.

"Yeah I'm gonna go now." He walked out.

As soon as the door closed behind Woody, Dean immediately spoke. "So are you two hunters then?"

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed. Dean shushed him.

"Hunters?" Shawn asked. He glanced at Gus, then back at the fake FBI agents. "We're standing over a human murder, and you're asking about animal murder?"

"Hunting is not animal murder, Shawn," Gus said.

Shawn clicked his tongue at Gus. "Same thing."

Dean narrowed his eyes. "I'm not talking about animal hunting. You're a psychic, right?"

Shawn nodded. "The one and only!"

Dean glanced at Sam.

"There's not only one psychic," Sam said slowly. He paused before continuing. "And how do we know you're a real psychic? You didn't know we were coming ahead of time."

"If I wasn't a real psychic, how would I know you two aren't actual FBI agents?" Shawn countered. 

The two looked at each other with wary expressions before Sam said, "If you were a real psychic, you would know who we really are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be updating ASAP!  
> Please give Kudos if you enjoyed this! 😊


	2. Fake Psychic, Fake FBI Agents...You Got Anything That's Real?

"That's not exactly how the spirit world works," Shawn said. "They don't just tell me who exactly everyone is. They tell me jumbled information. For example," he studied Dean. "You've been through a lot of trauma. You like cheeseburgers, and you had one earlier. You and Andre the Giant over there are brothers. You have not only a gun, but also a machete and a dagger. Nice hiding place for the dagger, by the way."

"How do you know all that stuff?" Dean asked suspiciously. 

Shawn put a finger to his temple and gave them a look as if they were stupid. "I'm a psychic, remember?"

"Listen here, chucklehead," Dean said as he shoved Shawn against a wall. "Stop pretending. We all know you aren't a psychic. If you were, you'd be able to tell us our real names. Now how did you get that information?" He shouted the last question.

Shawn held up his hands in surrender. "Okay okay! I'm not psychic. I know you've been through trauma because you have this extremely guarded look in your eyes. You still have some bread crumbs and a little bit of cheese on your coat from your cheeseburger earlier. You and Sammy stand too close to each other to be just FBI partners, and it's more of a familial thing than romantic. I can see the machete in your coat when you move, and the dagger around your ankle isn't exactly hidden enough for me to not notice it."

Dean stepped back at glanced at Sam. Sam raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"So since you know that I'm not psychic, I think me and Gus deserve to know who exactly you are," Shawn said. 

"I'm Dean Winchester, and this is my brother Sam. You know all those stories of monsters you were told as a kid? They're all real. Well, mostly."

"So vampires are real?" Gus asked.

Sam and Dean both nodded.

"Werewolves?" 

They nodded.

"What about Bigfoot?"

"Nah, Bigfoot's a hoax. Everyone who's anyone knows that," Dean answered. 

Gus looked at Shawn. "I told you!"

"Did you? I don't recall." Shawn shrugged and looked at Sam and Dean. "So there's a vampire running around Santa Barbara right now?"

Dean nodded. "And we gotta kill it."

"Oh, perfect!" Shawn exclaimed. "Gus has a crucifix in his desk, and I still have some holy water blessed by Father Westley!"

Dean looked at Sam in exasperation. 

"Those do nothing to vampires," Sam said. "In order to kill it, you gotta chop their heads off."

"Wait a minute," Gus said, turning to Shawn. "How did you know there was a crucifix in my desk?"

"It was right next to your taffies," Shawn replied. 

"I knew you took my taffies!"

"Did not."

"Did too!"

"You can't prove it."

"Guys!" Sam stepped in. "We don't have time to waste."

"So if crucifixes and holy water don't kill vampires, what does?" Gus asked. "Garlic? Silver bullet?"

"None of those work. The only way to gank a vamp is to chop off it's head," Dean said. He pulled out his machete. "That's what this is for."

"Then let's go!" Shawn exclaimed. "Where do we find it?"

"That's up to us to find out, since you two aren't hunters," Dean said. "Sammy, call Cas. I got some suspicions about the friendly neighborhood coroner."

Sam nodded and took out his phone.

"Meanwhile," Dean continued. "You two idiots stay here, out of danger. Me and Sammy gotta find the vamp that killed Stan the Man over there."

"Why can't we go?" Shawn asked.

"Because you aren't trained in this type of stuff. It's our job to protect civilians, so I'm not gonna let you two get killed while you're trying to take out a vamp." Dean started walking out of the station, but Shawn and Gus followed him.

"But this might be the only time we get to see a real vampire!" Shawn whined. "Let us goooooo!"

"You wanna be bait?"

"Of course not!"

"Then you can't come with us." 

Sam got off the phone and looked at Dean. "Cas said it's not a vamp, Dean," he said in a low voice. 

"What?" Dean said sharply. "How does he know?"

"He said that there's no vampire nests anywhere near Santa Barbara. Apparently another hunter cleared them all out a few months ago." 

Dean rubbed his face with his hand and groaned. "Does he know what it is then?"

Sam shook his head. "He said he'll have to come and see for himself."

"Who's Cas?" Shawn asked.

"A friend," Dean answered shortly before looking back at Sam. "Let's just go check into a motel for the night. I have a feeling we'll be here longer than we expected."

-That night, at the motel-

Sam was at a table with his computer opened in front of him, and Dean was pacing around the room. 

"What other monsters drain a person of their blood?" Dean wondered aloud. "Have you found anything yet?"

"Well there's something called a Baobhan Sith. It's a monster from Scottish lore. Apparently it appears as a beautiful woman who seduces her victim before drinking their blood. We could be dealing with that."

"Great, so a sexy Sith Lord that drinks blood," Dean said. "How do we kill it?"

"Well, it says in the lore that the Baobhan Sith can only be killed by iron. Oh, and they're scared of horses." 

"Great. How do we find it?"

"It only appears to someone after they 'express their desire for female companionship'." Sam closed the computer. 

"Okay..." Dean thought for a few seconds. "So how do we do that? Just say something like 'I'm so lonely and I need a girlfriend?'"

"In the stories, it's always a group of men. One or some of them says they wish they had partners or something, and that's when the siths show up." Sam opened his computer again. "Turns out there were two other deaths all in the same area as Mordachi."

"Both drained of blood?" Dean asked.

Sam nodded. "All three men were at the same bar on the same night."

"What bar?"

"It's called The Good Lion."

"The Good Lion?" Dean asked skeptically. He shook his head. "Whaddaya say we go check it out then?"

"We should bring along that psychic and his friend, though." He stood up and started to put his jacket on.

"Oh, come on, Sammy. They're just gonna slow us down!" 

"Well it's always a group of men that the siths attack," Sam pointed out.

Dean held out his arms. "So we can bring Cas! There were only three guys that were killed, so I'm sure it'd work."

Sam stared at Dean in silence for a moment, before saying, "Fine. But if it doesn't work, then we're calling Shawn."

Dean smiled. "Great. Lemme just call Cas." He took out his phone and dialed a number. After a few seconds, he smiled and said, "Cas! We need you in order to catch the Sith Lord." He paused. "No, you aren't going to be bait....we're at the uh," he checked the motel room key, "Hacienda Motel, room 116."

"Hello, Dean," said a low voice behind Dean.

Dean flipped his phone off and put it in his pocket while turning around. "Glad you could make it, Cas."

Cas stood there with his usual serious expression. Dean's heart sped up slightly at the sight of the angel. He didn't know why, so he ignored it.

"You guys ready to go, or do you wanna just keep standing there, staring at each other?" Sam asked. 

"Oh, shut up, Sammy." Dean grabbed his keys and walked out of the room, Sam and Cas following him. 

They drove to the bar in silence, except for Dean's music playing. When they got there, Dean saw a blue Toyota Echo in the parking lot.

"Nice blueberry," he muttered sarcastically. 

They went inside and sat down at the bar. Dean looked around, then groaned.

"What?" Sam asked.

"That idiot psychic is already here," he said as Shawn and Gus walked over.

"Hi guys!" Shawn said. "Fancy seeing you here!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're all idiots


	3. The Plot, Unlike Your Hair, Continues to Thicken

"Son of a bitch," Dean muttered. 

Shawn grinned. "Me and Gus traced the murders back to a group of guys who visited here a while ago, so we decided to stop by and see if the vampire works here or something. Any of you want a drink? They've got some awesome pineapple margaritas here."

Dean rolled his eyes. "No thanks. Cas, can't you poof them away, or something?" 

"No." 

Dean waited for him to elaborate, but when he wouldn't, he just turned back to Shawn and Gus. "You two need to leave, now."

"Yeah, Shawn," Gus said. "We should leave."

Shawn clicked his tongue at them all. "None of you have any faith in me! If Jules was here, she'd trust me."

"Hm. Too bad," Dean said. "But she's not, so you gotta leave before you get yourselves killed."

At that moment, five girls walked into the bar together. They were all wearing long, white dresses, so that their feet weren't showing. One had wavy black hair and bright blue eyes, and if Shawn was being honest with himself, he might've take note that she looked a lot like the female version of Lassie. She was very beautiful. The other four women were equally beautiful. 

"Jess," Shawn heard Sam whisper. He saw that Sam was looking at the one blonde, and he guessed she was Jess.

"She your girlfriend?" Shawn asked Sam.

Sam just looking at Shawn with glassy eyes. "She's dead."

Shawn just mouthed a silent 'oh'. That's awkward. He guessed these girls weren't vampires. He glanced over at Dean, who had a hardened look in his eyes.

"Soooo...." Shawn said. "Who are they?"

"Those are Baobhan Siths," the dude who was supposedly Castiel responded. Shawn wondered if he had ever had fun in his life before. He certainly looked like he didn't.

"Are we supposed to know what those are?" Gus asked.

"They're pretty much Scottish vampire fairies," Dean said. "They aren't something to mess with."

The women walked up to the group. The one the looked like Lassie went up to Shawn. "Wanna dance?" She asked. Her voice was sickly sweet and reminded him nothing of Lassie. Not to mention she had a strange accent that he couldn't quite place.

He gulped. "Soooo how do we kill these things? I don't imagine you guys have light sabers with you."

"You don't kill these things," Dean said. "We do. And sadly, light sabers wouldn't work on these Siths." He pulled out a dagger that looked like it was made from iron. He stabbed the girl that was advancing towards him in the gut, and she gasped. The wound around the dagger started smoking, and she fell to the ground, dead.

Dean took the dagger and stabbed the girl who was approaching Castiel next. This time he had a furious expression on his face. Almost as if...no, that couldn't be. 

"Hey, a little help over here?" Shawn called. The girl-who-looked-like-Lassie kept trying to get him to dance. He looked down and saw a hoof peek out from the edge of her dress. "She has hooves," he said mostly to himself.

Suddenly she gasped and slumped to the ground, revealing Dean standing there, cleaning off his dagger. "Yep. Good observation." 

Shawn looked around and saw that the other two Siths were dead now, and Sam was cleaning off a dagger of his own that was similar to Dean's. Meanwhile, Gus was hiding behind Castiel, and Castiel was touching the body of one of the Siths with his foot, as if to check if it was still alive.

"So is that it? Are they gone forever now?" Shawn asked.

"Unless there are more, yes," Dean answered. He put his dagger away and went over to Castiel and Sam. 

Shawn stayed back for a moment to see how Dean interacted with Castiel. The trench-coated stranger had something intriguing about him, and Shawn wanted to know more about him. From what he could tell from having interacted with him in this short amount of time, he was stoic and reserved. He didn't know how to tie a tie correctly, and he hadn't had his trenchcoat washed in a while. Shawn could see a small dark stain on one of the lapels, and if he had to guess, he'd say it was a bloodstain.

And then there was the matter of how Dean looked at him. As he spoke to him, he had this intense look in his eyes that Shawn had only seen in someone once before. He had seen that same look in Lassie's eyes the one night they were at the bar, and Lassie told Shawn that he astounded him. 

It was something beyond platonic, beyond familial. Shawn just didn't have the guts to figure out what it was.

"Shawn, you coming or what?" Gus interrupted his thoughts.

"Hm?" Shawn looked up - since when was he staring at girl-Lassie on the floor? - and realized the others were looking at him expectantly. "Did you say something?"

"We're leaving," Gus said. "You coming?"

"Oh, right. Of course! Hey by the way, guys," he looked at Sam, Dean, and Castiel, "If you want, you can come hang out at the Psych office for a while."

Sam and Dean looked at each other and had what Shawn could only assume was a silent conversation.

Castiel spoke up first. "I have to get back to Heaven." He promptly disappeared. 

"Does he always leave like that?" Shawn tried to joke around, but that probably freaked him out more than the Siths did. 

Dean clenched his jaw. "You get used to it after a while." 

"Okay, so what is Cas?" Gus asked.

"First of all, it's Castiel, to you," Dean said sharply. "And he's an angel."

Shawn raised an eyebrow. "You're smitten with him, aren't you? You two are lovers in the night!"

"What? No!" Dean answered quickly. He looked at Sam for help, but Sam just shrugged. He huffed. "I meant that Castiel is literally an angel. From heaven."

"Oh, I got that part," Shawn said. "Nevermind. Listen, you two should come to the Psych office with me and Gus. We can watch Star Wars! Or Star Trek, if you're more into that."

Gus slapped Shawn's arm. "You do realize they're basically strangers, right?" He hissed.

"Oh, I'm fully aware. Which is why I want them to come!"

Sam spoke up. "We really shouldn't stay here very long."

Dean nodded in agreement before saying, "Wait a second. Cas left before we got to figure out the whole thing with Zachariah."

Realization spread over Sam's face, then dread. "Crap. Forgot about that."

"Who's Zachariah?" Gus asked. "Do I even want to know?"

"He's one of the douchiest angels in the Garrison," Dean answered. "No one likes him. Your coroner buddy looks exactly like him."

"Wait," Sam said abruptly. "What if the coroner is Zachariah's vessel?"

Dean paused to think. "That...actually would make sense."

"Wait, vessel? What does that mean?" Gus asked. 

Dean shook his head dismissively. "No time to explain. What do we even do if the coroner is Zachariah's vessel?"

"I don't know. We can't just kill him, and there's no way to prevent Zachariah from inhabiting him if he already said yes."

Shawn looked at Gus with an expression that said 'what is going on'. Gus shot back an equally confused look. 

"So..." Shawn interrupted, dragging out the word. "While you two panic about...whatever you're panicking about, do you wanna at least do it in a place that's not a bar? And not surrounded by dead Siths?"

Dean glanced at Shawn. "Fine, but only to make you stop asking. Oh, and there better be some bacon cheeseburgers there."

Shawn's eyes widened and he slapped Gus on the shoulder. "See? I'm not the only one who likes those!"

"Shawn, they smell terrible and you always leave grease stains on our bills," Gus responded.

Shawn rolled his eyes and looked back at Sam and Dean. "Don't mind him, he's a cheeseburger hater."

"I don't hate cheeseburgers, Shawn. Just the bacon cheeseburger."

Dean intervened. "Okay," he dragged out the word. "Let's just get going and worry about food later."

They walked out to their cars, and Shawn told Dean to just follow him to the Psych office. Once they got there, Shawn led them inside. The lights were off, and when he flipped them on, he frowned. 

"Lassie? What are you doing here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whatcha doing Lassie? 🤔


	4. Awkward Reunions

Dean watched as Detective Lassiter spun around at lightning speed. 

"Spencer!" Lassiter yelped. He noticed Sam and Dean and straightened up. "Agents."

"What are you doing here, Lassie?" Shawn asked. 

Dean spoke up. "Well me and Sam are gonna go now." He began backing towards the door, pulling Sam along.

Gus joined them. "Can I go with you? I don't wanna have to deal with their tension."

Sam raised an eyebrow at Dean, and Dean just shrugged.

"Sure, but we're probably just going back to our motel," Sam answered.

"Wait!" Lassiter called. "I wanted to talk to you two!"

Dean groaned and Sam elbowed him. 

"Ummm Lassie, you never answered me," Shawn said.

"Spencer, not everything is about you!" Lassiter turned to Sam and Dean again while Gus just shook his head and left the Psych office. "Listen, I know you guys are probably busy, but would you mind staying around for a while?"

"Uh, what for?" Dean asked. "We solved the murder case and caught the killer."

"You did?" Lassiter frowned. "Where's the killer now?"

Dean glanced at Sam, then looked back at Lassiter. "We apprehended them and are taking them back to our supervisor. They were one of the top most wanted killers."

"Oh." Lassiter nodded as he took in the information. "Okay then. Still, can you stick around for a bit? Help out with a few more cases?"

Dean shook his head. "Sorry, man, but we should really get going as soon as possible."

"But why? Can't you call your supervisor and ask them to let you stay?"

"Lassie, they aren't real FBI agents," Shawn said. "They can't help."

Lassie furrowed his eyebrows and frowned again. "Excuse me? Is he telling the truth?"

Sam was giving Shawn the death glare so hard, that Dean knew if looks could kill, Shawn would be a dead man. Dean shook his head and put a hand on his hip. "Of course he's not telling the truth. If you want, you can call our supervisor yourself."

Lassiter looked back at Shawn, who was shaking his head in a 'don't believe them' sort of way. Now both Sam and Dean were giving Shawn the death glare.

The detective turned back to Sam and Dean, who immediately changed their expressions to be polite and innocent. He examined them for a good ten seconds before narrowing his eyes suspiciously. 

"Son of a bitch," Lassie said disappointedly. "I'm gonna need you two to turn around. You're under arrest for falsely impersonating members of the FBI." 

"Shawn, next time I see you, I'm going to kill you," Dean said with a scowl. 

"Wait, Lassie, don't arrest them!"

Lassiter turned to face Shawn incredulously. "Excuse me?"

"They aren't FBI agents, but they are the good guys. They hunt monsters!"

"Enough of your games Spencer! I'm tired of you always doing this!" Lassiter once again faced Sam and Dean and got out his handcuffs.

"He's telling the truth," Sam said.

Lassiter froze. "You two are really going along with this?"

"We aren't 'going along with' anything," Dean said, using air quotes. "This guy's a literal idiot. You wouldn't ever find us going along with him. But right now he's telling the truth. We hunt anything that goes bump in the night. Vampires, werewolves. Hell, we even hunt demons!"

Lassiter looked between Sam and Dean, then back at Shawn. He seemed to realize how serious everyone was. He slowly put his handcuffs away. "I can't believe I'm listening to a bunch of nut jobs right now."

Dean smirked. "You got that right. Now. Me and Sammy are going to leave, and neither of you are going to try to stop us. And Detective, if you even try to contact authorities about us being here, I will hunt your ass down myself and kill you."

Lassiter's face paled. "Noted."

"Great!" Dean clapped his hands and smiled at Shawn and Lassiter. "Let's go, Sammy!"

-

After the hunters left, Shawn turned back to Lassie. "You never answered me. What were you doing here?"

Shawn could've sworn he saw Lassie's face turn the slightest shade of pink. His eyes darted around the room, avoiding Shawn's gaze.

"I was just seeing what you had about the case with the guy drained of his blood. I wanted in on it, especially if the feds were working it."

Shawn narrowed his eyes slightly. He could tell that wasn't the only reason, but he didn't press any further.

"Okay then. Well, we solved the case. It wasn't a vampire - don't give me that look! - it was a Baobhan Sith." 

Lassie sighed. "Am I supposed to know what that is? You know - nevermind. So monsters are real." It was more of a statement than a question, but Shawn nodded anyways. "And those two guys hunt them? For a living?"

"Well they don't really get paid for it, but yes," Shawn answered. 

"Does that mean you're really a psychic?" Lassie asked quietly. He finally made eye contact with Shawn, and the sincerity in his eyes made Shawn be the one to look away. His face must've given him away. He heard Lassie curse under his breath. "I was actually beginning to trust you, Spencer."

"Look, Lassie-"

"Don't 'Look, Lassie' me! You've been lying to us all since day one! How are we supposed to trust you?!" Lassie turned away and scoffed. "I can't believe I trusted a child in an adult body."

Those words stung more than Shawn was comfortable with. "I had no choice," he said softly. "It was either that or you guys would lock me up for something I didn't do."

Lassie whipped back around. "You could've told the truth, Shawn!"

"You think I didn't try? I did try! But you wouldn't listen!" Shawn took a deep breath. "Look, I think we should just both take a deep breath, okay?"

Lassie was silent for a few moments before saying, "Shawn, you terrify me."

"Wait....what?"

"When I'm around you, I feel something in my chest that I don't feel around anyone else. It terrifies me." 

Shawn didn't know how to respond. He eventually went with, "Uh...I...I feel the same."

Lassie looked at Shawn in surprise. "You do?" He asked quickly. Then he shook his head and looked away again. "I should go."

"Wait!" Shawn reached out and grabbed Lassie's hand. "I don't know what this feeling is, but...it's good, right? It's not a bad feeling." He sounded unsure of himself. 

Lassie nodded with uncertainty. "I think so."

"Why don't we see where it leads then?" Shawn asked as he stepped closer to Lassie. 

Lassie licked his lips, and Shawn glanced at them, then back up at his eyes. He could feel the taller man's breath on his lips, and the butterflies in him felt like they were trying to learn karate. 

Lassie stepped away. "We shouldn't be doing this." He let go of Shawn's hand and started heading towards the door. "I have to go." Shawn tried to tell him to wait, but he was already out the door.

Shawn lightly touched his lips where he had felt Lassiter's breath. "Wow, Lassie. You really know how to make a girl feel special, dontcha?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm...
> 
> Thank you guys for reading this! 
> 
> Comments and Kudos make my day!


	5. Angels are Douches

The next morning, Dean called Cas almost as soon as he woke up. 

"Dean?" came the angel's voice from over the phone.

"Cas, buddy, can you come to the motel?"

There was a whoosh, and suddenly Cas was standing in front of Dean. "I'm here."

Dean hung up. "Thanks. So, about the coroner. What do we even do with him? Assuming he is Zack's vessel, of course."

Cas looked away. "I don't know. I assume Zachariah must be letting the coroner take possession of the body sometimes. I'm not sure if we can do anything about it."

"Well, isn't there some sort of angel exorcism?" Dean asked. 

Cas hesitated. "Yes, but I have no way of knowing how damaged the vessel may be. I'd have to get close enough to touch him, and I don't think Zachariah would let me that close."

"Well, we have to try. Come on, we should go now."

"Where's Sam?" Cas asked.

Dean sighed. "He's out on his morning run or whatever. I'll call him and tell him what we're doing." Dean seemed to realize right then how unnecessarily close he and Cas were standing, and he couldn't help but glance down at the angel's lips for a second before looking away. 

"Let's just go, before..." he trailed off as he grabbed the keys to the impala.

"Before what?" Cas asked.

Dean shook his head and gave Cas a thin smile. "Nothing." 

They got in the car, and Dean drove to the police station after giving Sam a voicemail, telling him where they were going.

Dean and Cas walked into the station and were immediately met with Shawn and Gus, who were being escorted by Lassiter, all while yelling something about hot dog stands.

"Excuse me," Dean said loudly. "What's going on here?"

Lassiter sneered at him. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

At that moment, Chief Vick walked up. "Agents," she said to Dean and Cas. "I thought the case was solved?"

Dean smiled at her. "Yes! It is. We were just hoping to talk to the coroner about some last minute things, just to seal up the case."

Chief nodded. "Detective Lassiter, would you please escort these two to the coroner?" She walked away without waiting for a response, and Lassiter glared at Dean while Dean just smiled smugly at the detective.

"This way," Lassiter said curtly, walking in the direction of the coroner's office. Shawn and Gus decided to come along as well, much to everyone's annoyance.

As soon as Woody saw them, he gave them a big smile. "Hello again! You're new," he said to Cas.

"Zachariah," Cas said firmly. "We need to talk."

Suddenly Woody's eyes glowed blue, and his posture changed. His goofy smile was replaced with a serious face.

"Castiel," he said. "What a pleasant surprise. So, you found where my vessel lives."

"Wait a second, who are you?" Lassiter asked.

"I am Zachariah, angel of the Lord," Zach answered. He looked at Cas again. "What did you wish to talk about?"

"Why are you here? Why are you letting your vessel take control? It's not like you."

Zach chuckled. "It was my means of camouflage, I suppose. I figured you wouldn't kill a kooky, innocent, old coroner. But now that you know who I am, I suppose I could just kill dear old Woody."

"No!" Shawn shouted. "You can't kill him!"

"And who are you to stop me?" Zach challenged. "You're just a fake psychic. You aren't even a hunter! After I kill Woody here, maybe I should take you up as a vessel. You seem strong enough to be one."

Shawn shook his head. "Not gonna happen."

"Again, who are you to stop me?"

Suddenly there was a new voice. "Brothers! How wonderful to see you both!"

Dean's gaze hardened and he looked behind him to see the one and only Gabriel. 

"Gabriel," Cas said. "What are you doing here?"

"Hello to you too, Castiel. Can't I just drop in on my two favorite brothers? Well, Zachariah isn't really a fave of mine, but Cassie, you are!" Gabriel grinned and a snickers bar appeared in his hand. He peeled back the wrapper and took a bite out of it. 

"Gabriel!" Zachariah said. Dean thought he could almost detect a hint of fear in his voice. "How lovely it is to see you. I was just on my way out!"

"Okay this really is a touching reunion," Lassiter said, "but I'm gonna leave now."

Dean noticed that Lassiter was gripping Shawn's hand, their fingers intertwined. He glanced down at his own hand, which was only an inch away from Castiel's. He looked back up and realized Gabriel was talking.

"-but no one is leaving yet," he finished.

"Listen," Dean said, speaking to both Gabriel and Zachariah, "you douche bags are going to let the people who aren't hunters leave, and we can work this out. Got it?"

Gabriel smirked. "So sassy." He made a desk chair appear and sat down in it, lounging back. "Fine. I'll let the fake psychic and his two boyfriends go."

Lassiter gave Gabriel the death glare, and so did Gus. Shawn seemed caught up in his own world.

"Guys, just go," Dean told them. Gus nodded quickly and began pulling Lassoter and Shawn out of the room. Once the door closed behind them, Gabriel spoke up again.

"So, Dean-o. You ready to say yes to Michael yet?"

"Is that the only reason you're here right now?" Dean responded. "To get me to say yes? Well it's not gonna happen, dick bag."

"Hmm, too bad," Gabriel said. Then he turned to Zachariah. "I think you've got a hold on things quite nicely here, so I'm gonna go now. See ya later losers!" With a whoosh, he disappeared. 

Zachariah looked at Dean and Cas. "Looks like I've got you all to myself then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kinda losing inspiration for this fic, so I think I'm gonna complete it a lot sooner than I thought I would
> 
> I might make a continuation later on though
> 
> Anyways enjoy this chapter and comments are always appreciated!


	6. Cloudy...With a Chance of Murder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I don't actually know what happens to the vessel when they're possessed by an angel, so I kinda took a guess. (They probably just black out, like Sam did with Gadreel, but idk I wanted to make it more interesting)

“I don’t want to be involved in this!” Gus said. “I never signed up to deal with angels!”

Shawn was still holding Lassie’s hand tightly. They were at the Psych office, after they escaped from Not-Woody. 

“Well we can’t just let Woody die,” Shawn said. “The angel that was in him was threatening to kill him!”

“FIne, Shawn. How do you suggest we deal with an angel possessing our friend? Huh? Last time I checked, none of us know the first thing about that. And how do we even know he really is an angel? Aren’t angels supposed to be peaceful and, you know, angelic?” 

“Well Dean seemed pretty sure that they were angels. I mean, isn’t Castiel also an angel? He wasn’t as mean as the others,” Shawn pointed out. 

“I know how to get rid of Zachariah,” Lassie suddenly spoke up. 

Shawn and Gus looked at him in surprise. 

“You do? Without hurting Woody?”

“We don’t need Woody,” Lassie said in a low voice.

Shawn exchanged a look with Gus, and he slowly stepped away from Lassie, letting go of his hand. “Uh, Lassie? Are you okay?”

Lassie grabbed his arm as if it was in pain. He frowned and rolled up the sleeve of his shirt, revealing what looked like a welt, but was too precise of a shape to be just an accident. 

“What is that?” Shawn asked, stepping closer to get a better look.

“The mark.” Lassie didn’t give any other explanation, but he looked murderous. “I stayed away!” He yelled, looking up. “I stayed away from everything! I didn’t kill! I just wanted to live a somewhat normal life!” He looked down at his arm. The mark was becoming more red and it looked irritated. “This is what you repay me with?!”

“Lassie who are you talking to?” Shawn asked.

Gus was backing away, towards the door.

Lassie looked at Shawn, and Shawn could tell there was definitely a change in him. There was some sort of rage in his eyes, and that was the moment that Shawn began fearing for his life. Whatever was happening to Lassie was something so...so otherworldly.

“Lassie, you’re kinda scaring me,” Shawn said nervously.

“My name isn’t Lassie,” he all but growled. He then walked toward the door, but Shawn reached out and stopped him. 

“Well then, Carlton.” Shawn ignored the death glare that Lassie shot at him. 

“Uh, Shawn, I think you should let him go,” Gus said. “He looks like he wants to kill you, and I have no doubt he will.”

Shawn clicked his tongue at Gus. “Don’t be a mongoose, Gus. He won’t kill me.” He looked back at Lassie. “You won’t kill me, right?”

“I won’t kill anyone until I’ve killed Zachariah,” Lassie said in a threatening tone. “After him, I make no promises.”

Shawn stood back and watched Lassie pace back and forth. He didn’t know what was going on, but he decided he would have to talk to Sam and Dean about it. Maybe they knew what was going on. That’s when he remembered that Dean and Castiel were still facing off against Zachariah.

“Guys, we gotta go save Dean and Castiel!”

Lassie scoffed. “A couple of humans saving Dean Winchester and an angel from another angel?” He rolled his eyes. “Figures.”

“You say that as if you aren’t a human,” Gus commented.

“Obviously. I’m—”

Shawn interrupted. “Who cares?! We gotta go now!”

So they all got into the blueberry, and Gus drove them as quickly as he could to the police office. While they drove, Shawn frantically tried to come up with a plan to save them. He remembered seeing the shift in Woody’s face when Zachariah took over, but he didn’t quite know what to do with that information. Zachariah had taken over when Castiel called his name, so maybe that would work for Woody, too. Maybe he could somehow get Woody to take over again and get rid of Zachariah. 

They arrived at the station and Shawn and Lassie rushed to the morgue while Gus stayed behind. When they got to the morgue, Dean and Castiel were on the ground, both coughing up blood. Zachariah was in the middle of saying, “—you will say yes to Michael!”

He looked up when Lassie and Shawn entered, and a half surprised, half delighted expression appeared on his face. 

“Ah, the fake psychic and his buddy, Ca—” he stopped himself, then continued, “the detective.” 

“Woody!” Shawn called out. “I know you’re in there! You have to fight this guy!”

Zachariah chuckled. “That’s not gonna work, Shawny boy. Right now, it’s like dear old Woody’s sleeping. He can’t hear you.”

Shawn ignored him and continued on. “Woody! Come on, please listen! You have to kick this guy out!”

For a second, Zachariah’s face shifted and became more Woody-ish, then went back to being Zachariah. 

“Yes! Come on! Fight him!” Shawn pretty much shouted.

Zachariah scoffed, but Shawn could see a bit of nervousness in his expression. “He’s too weak. He can’t fight me.” He smiled smugly. “You want to save your friend?”

Shawn hesitantly nodded.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes! Okay? I do!”

“Splendid.” Suddenly he opened his mouth and a blue light spilled out and forced itself down Shawn’s throat. 

Shawn didn’t know how to explain it. The blue light went down his throat, then suddenly he was at home. He was watching his parents from the stairs. They were sitting on the couch, talking. Arguing was a better term to apply to it. They hadn’t started yelling, but just the sound of the agitation in their voices was enough to set Shawn on edge. He turned and tried to walk out the door, but when he walked through, he ended up at Camp Tikihama. It was swim time, and he was sitting on the beach, watching Gus play in the water with Jason. The hurt and betrayal that he had shoved down all those years ago began to resurface.

“Shawn!”

He was suddenly back at his house, sitting on the couch. His dad was in front of him, explaining why his mom wasn’t there. Shawn refused to listen, and he went up to his room. He didn’t answer when his dad knocked on the door. He didn’t eat. He didn’t leave his room for days.

“Shawn!”

He looked out his window.

“Shawn, listen to me!”

He was suddenly back in the morgue. Dean and Cas were now standing in front of him, all signs of blood gone. Woody was slumped against the wall, unconscious. Lassie was nowhere in sight. He could still feel something inside of him, and with all of his energy, he shoved it out of him. The blue light shot out of his mouth and back into Woody, and Woody suddenly woke and stood up.

He shook his head as if to clear it. “Wow. What a complex monkey-brain,” he said in a distinct Zachariah voice. 

Cas suddenly had a silver blade in his hand, and Dean pulled an identical blade out of his jacket. 

“Leave, before he returns and kills us all,” Cas said threateningly.

“Before who returns and kills us all?” Shawn asked.

Everyone ignored him, which really puzzled Shawn. He was asking a legitimate question!

Zachariah frowned. “Fine. I’ll just have to erase your memories of ever being in this town. I’ll still be here of course, just under the guise of a stupid old coroner.” He looked down at his body in almost disgust. 

That’s when Lassie decided to arrive, and he had a blade of his own. Well, sort of a blade. It was more like the jawbone of a donkey, with teeth on it and everything. It kinda grossed Shawn out, if he was being honest.

Zachariah looked at Lassie in utter fear, and Shawn realized Dean and Cas were standing in front of Shawn in an almost protective manner. That’s when it dawned on Shawn that maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t Lassie. No, this was someone much more powerful, and much, much more murderous.

“Hello, Cain,” Zachariah said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading! Comments are always welcome
> 
> I'm having a hard time getting inspiration for this, so thank you guys for your patience!
> 
> Also if you want to add me on tumblr, my username is @destiel-its-natural-habitat


	7. The Memory Remains

Dean glanced between Lassiter and Zachariah with a frown, then looked at Cas in confusion. ‘Who’s Cain?’

Cas shook his head, silently dismissing the question. He raised his angel blade toward Zachariah. “Why is he here?” he demanded.

Zachariah glared at Cas. “You think I know?” He looked back at Lassiter. “Whe are you here, Cain?”

Dean spoke up. “Hold on just a second.” He saw Cas shoot him a look out of the corner of his eye, but he ignored it. “Who’s Cain?”

Zachariah chuckled. “You really thought this...this monster here,” he gestured at Lassiter, “was really just a simple detective? No...he’s a demon. Not just any demon, though. He was the first demon. The father of murder.”

Dean glanced back at Shawn, to see if he had any clue what Zach was talking about. Shawn just shrugged and shook his head, so Dean turned back to Zach. 

“So, Cain, back to the main question. Why are you here?!” Zachariah shouted. 

“I came here to get away from my past,” Cain growled out. “I thought maybe I could have a chance at normalcy. I dealt with murder every single day as a detective. I even got away with killing a few people when no one was looking, then showing up to that murder and solving the case. I knew Shawn wasn’t psychic; otherwise, he would’ve known I wasn’t Carlton Lassiter. But I was content here. No one knew who — what — I was. Until you showed up.” There was murder in his eyes as he looked at Zachariah. “I knew as soon as I saw Woody that there was something about him.” He scoffed. “Little did I know that something about him was an angel possessing him. Figures.”

Cas spoke up. “So you’re going to kill Zachariah, then?”

“Why not? He’s the one that brought my past back to me.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this right now, but you don’t have to do this,” Dean said. “We could have Cas wash your memories of us and Zach ever being here. You could go back to your life as a detective.”

Cain barked a humorless laugh. “But then you guys would still know who I am. I can’t have that, see. I can’t have anyone knowing who I really am, not without them ending up dead.” He turned his glare back to Zachariah. “I think I’ll start with killing you.”

“Lassie, wait!”

Cain stopped moving, and the room went silent. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath as Cain slowly looked toward Shawn. “I told you, my name isn’t Lassie.”

“But if you take their offer, it can be again,” Shawn pointed out. “I can have my memories washed, too. I won’t remember that you’re...Cain, or whatever.”

Cain seemed to consider this. “You realize they would take away all memories of these past few days, right? You wouldn’t remember...you wouldn’t remember any of the moments.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows and frowned in confusion. He looked back at Shawn and saw the pained expression on his face, and he realized this must’ve been about their holding-hand thing earlier.

“I know,” Shawn said. “But it would be better than you ending up...ending up as whatever is going on with you right now.”

For a brief moment, Dean wondered what it was like to have a bond like the one Shawn and Cain/Lassiter had. He had never realized he wanted a bond like that. He glanced at Cas, who wasn’t paying attention to him. He knew that 2014 him and 2014 Cas obviously had some sort of relationship that went beyond friendship, but he hadn’t realized until that moment that he had ever wanted that. But he did. He wanted it so bad. He wanted what Shawn and Lassiter had between them to be between him and Cas. 

“Do it, then,” Cain said, bringing Dean out of his musings. “Take away my memory. But you have to take away the Winchester’s and their angel’s memories away too.”

Cas looked at Dean, and he felt his heart threaten to jump out of his chest. He cleared his throat. “Fine. As long as no one gets killed. We’ll leave, and we won’t come back.”

Zachariah clapped once. “Only one problem with that. I can’t erase Cas’s memories, but I can most definitely take the Winchester’s. I can then transport you to a motel in some city on the other side of the country, and you won’t remember this encounter at all.”

Dean had an idea, and just the thought of it made his heart leap up into his throat. He looked at Cas and made up his mind. He wouldn’t remember this anyways, right?

He reached out before he could change his mind and pulled Cas closer to him, crushing their lips together. He felt Cas stiffen for a few seconds before melting into the kiss. He cradled Cas’s face in his hands, never wanting the moment to end. He kind of wished he could remember just this moment, but he knew it had to be taken away.

Someone cleared their throat, and Dean reluctantly stepped away from Cas, his eyes still closed and the taste of Cas’s lips still there. 

“I’m ready now,” he said. He opened his eyes and looked at Zachariah in determination. “Take our memories now.” He resisted the urge to look at Cas. He didn’t want to know what kind of expression was there, because if he did, he knew it would be a lot harder to let Zach take their memories.

“Okay, then. That wasn’t expected.” Zachariah looked between Cain and Shawn. “You guys got anything like that you want to do?”

Cain immediately shook his head. “Just get it over with.”

“Great.” Zachariah smiled and snapped his fingers, and everything went dark.

-

Dean woke up in the motel they had spent the night at. Sam was already up, drinking coffee while staring at a computer screen. He blinked a few times, trying to get the sleep out of his eyes.

“Mornin’ Sammy.”

Sam looked over. “Hey. So get this,” he started rambling about some case in New York while Dean got up and poured himself a glass of El Sol. 

“What are you thinking it is?” Dean asked.

“I’m thinking werewolf, maybe.” Sam looked at Dean. “You okay?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah. Did we do something this week? The past few days are kinda hazy for me.”

Sam frowned. “I’m pretty sure we were on a Baobhan Sith case in Texas.”

Dean shook his head. “Other than that. I feel like something really important happened yesterday.”

“Hm. I don’t think so. We were mostly on the road.”

“Weird.”

Sam went back to looking at his computer, and Dean sat on his bed, trying to remember. He knew it was going to bother him until he remembered what happened yesterday, but for the life of him, he couldn’t think of a single remarkable thing. That’s when Cas decided to show up.

Dean jumped slightly when he saw him.

“Hello, Dean. Sam.” Cas was looking at Dean intensely, and Dean started to wonder if something was wrong.

“You okay, buddy?” He asked.

Something in Cas’s gaze gave Dean the impression that there was something he didn’t know. Maybe it had to do with the feeling that he was forgetting something. 

“I’m fine.” Cas looked away. “I was just checking in on you. I...I wanted to make sure you were okay after dealing with the siths.”

Sam was looking between Dean and Cas, as if he sensed there was something going on, but he didn’t comment. “Yeah, we’re fine, Cas.”

Cas nodded. “Good. I’ll...I’ll be going now. Call me if you need anything.” With that, he disappeared.

Sam looked at Dean in question, but Dean just shrugged. He was just as confused as Sam. 

“That was weird.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, it was.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry guys! This won't be the end. Not gonna spoil anything, but they will eventually figure things out
> 
> Kudos and Comments are always appreciated!


	8. The Tale of Despereaux

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while, I just haven't had any motivation, and I've been kinda busy with school and stuff. Anyways, enjoy

-fast forward a couple months-

“Gus! Gus, wake up! I have big news!”

Shawn was standing in front of Gus’s desk, where he had apparently fallen asleep at his computer. Gus groaned and slowly woke up.

“What do you want, Shawn?”

“Gus, it’s like, ten o’clock in the morning, wake up!”

Gus suddenly sat up at that. “It’s ten o’clock?! Why didn’t you wake me up sooner?”

Shawn rolled his eyes. “I didn’t even know you were here until I came to tell you this fantastic news.”

“What’s the news?” Gus closed his computer and started stacking the papers that were strewn all over the desk.

“Despereaux is back!”

Gus stopped what he was doing and looked at Shawn. “What?”

Shawn grinned. “Despereaux, man!”

“He’s back in Santa Barbara?” Gus slowly went back to what he was doing.

“Well, no,” Shawn conceded. Then his face lit up. “Even better! He’s in Las Vegas!”

Gus rolled his eyes. “We are not going to Las Vegas, Shawn.”

“Why not?” Shawn whined. “Come onnnn Gus! I even convinced Chief to let us go on official business!”

“Fine, you can go. You already know I have an important event to go to for my job, so I can’t go.”

“You mean the whole week-long cruise thing? Yeah, that seems sooo much more important than Pierre Despereaux.” 

Gus shot Shawn a glare, and Shawn sighed and pouted. “Fiiine. I’ll ask Lassie to go with me, then.”

“Good. I’m glad you’ll have a partner, since you can’t seem to function without one. Just one thing — while you’re with Lassie, make sure you get whatever’s going on between you two resolved.”

Shawn frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“Shawn, everyone can tell there’s something going on. You both keep avoiding each other, and whenever you’re in the same room, you’re always staring at each other. Anyone else in the room with you two can pretty much feel the tension.” Gus shook his head. “Just get it figured out.”

Shawn rolled his eyes. “Yeah, sure, whatever.” 

“I’m serious, Shawn.”

"Bye Gus!"

-

Shawn went to the station and frowned. It was a lot busier than normal. People were rushing bye, and there was a group of people at the desk, everyone shouting. He went over to Juliet's desk.

"Jules, what's going on? Why are there so many people here?"

She rolled her eyes. "They're from the bank. The vault was broken into last night, and they're blaming us for not stopping it."

"Wow."

Jules nodded and picked up a pile of papers and started walking away, so Shawn followed her.

"By the way, do you happen to know where Lassie is?" He asked.

"At his desk, I assume. Why?"

"Despereaux is in Las Vegas, and I need a partner to go with me to check it out."

She gave him the side-eye and furrowed her eyebrows. "Why don't you take Gus?"

"He's busy," Shawn said in a whiny voice. "He said he wouldn't go, even for Despereaux. Ha, that rhymed."

"That didn't rhyme, Shawn."

"Yes it did. He said he wouldn't GO, even for DesperEAUX." 

Juliet shook her head. "Nevermind. Anyways, I'm really busy right now. Carlton should be by his desk."

"Thanks, Jules!"

Shawn jogged over to Lassie's desk and slammed his hands down while grinning. "Lassieeee!"

Lassiter groaned and put his face in his hands. "What now, Spencer?"

"We're going to Las Vegas!"

Lassie looked up and squinted. "Excuse me?"

"Las Vegas, man!" 

"Why are we going to Las Vegas?" Lassie asked, exasperated.

"Despereaux's there!" Shawn exclaimed. 

Lassie raised an eyebrow skeptically. "How do you know?"

Shawn put his finger to his temple and made a 'duh' expression. "Psychic, remember?"

Lassie rolled his eyes. "Okay. Why isn't Guster going with you?"

"He has a cruise with his pharmaceutical company."

"He still works there?"

"Apparently."

Lassie sighed. "Fine, I'll go. Does Chief know?"

"Yep! I already asked earlier this morning." Shawn bounced on the balls of his feet. 

"When do we leave?" 

"I was thinking like now-ish," Shawn said. 

Lassie started grumbling something about always being dragged into things like this, but he got up. 

"I'm going home to pack up some stuff, because I assume we'll be there for a few days at least," Lassiter said.

"Great idea! I'll go with you!"

Lassie rolled his eyes yet again, but didn't argue. They went out to Lassie's car together, and Shawn got into the passenger seat. The ride home was quiet. Shawn tried to start a conversation a few times, but Lassie's answers were short, as if he didn't want to talk.

When they got to Lassiter's house, Lassie told Shawn to stay in the car, which Shawn completely ignored.

They both walked into Lassie's place, and Shawn looked around. It was a nice house. The aesthetic was simple, yet elegant, just like Lassie himself. Shawn immediately spotted three guns hidden in different places. He was sure there were more, too. 

"Nice place, Lassie."

Lassie ignored him and started packing stuff into a bag. Typical.

"So. Um. I know things have been awkward between us," Shawn said.

Lassie scoffed.

"Is that something we aren't gonna talk about? Or…" Shawn trailed off.

Lassiter turned to look at Shawn. "We aren't gonna talk about it because there's nothing to talk about." He continued packing.

"Ooookay." Shawn sat down on a couch. "Does this have to do with your undying love for me?" He joked.

Lassie froze for a second before going back to packing. It was quick enough that most people wouldn't notice, but Shawn did. He furrowed his brows in thought.

"Wait...seriously?"

Lassiter packed faster. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Uh-huh, sure. Lassie, you're in love with me!" Shawn grinned.

That must bot have been the answer Lassiter was expecting. He turned around and faced Shawn. "You don't know that."

"You aren't denying it," Shawn countered.

"Okay, so what if I am? That doesn't change anything. You're in love with Juliet. Everyone can see that. So what if I...like...you? So what if I hate watching you be so desperately in love with her? So what if I just want to be your friend, and I keep messing up? So what if I can't help but be a jerk to you, no matter how hard I try not to?" He turned away again. "Forget it. Forget I said anything."

Shawn's smile was gone by now. "You think I'm in love with Jules?"

"Obviously!" Lassie yelled. "You stare at her and follow her around like a lost puppy with heart eyes!"

"No...Lassie she's just my friend. There's nothing more going on between us."

"....What?"

"Lassie...I always thought you hated me."

Lassiter tried to say something, but Shawn cut him off. "Let me finish. I know usually I'm always joking around about things like thid, but you get a serious Shawn moment here. I thought you hated me, but I've been in love with you for years."

Lassie's face went blank. "Oh."

They stood in an awkward silence for a few moments, before Shawn said, "So are you done packing?"

"Nice change of subject, Spencer."

"Why thank you."

Lassie zipped up the bag he was packing and hoisted the strap over his shoulder. "Let's go to Las Vegas."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning on actually having them meet up with Despereaux in this chapter, but I guesd that'll have to wait. This is kinda rushed but oh well


	9. White Collar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I last updated this! 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy this chapter

The drive to Las Vegas was quiet, as long as Carlton blocked out Spencer’s constant talking. He knew Spencer was just trying to keep things from getting awkward, but he didn’t bother giving any more than one-word answers. Eventually Spencer just turned on some music. ‘I Will Wait’ by Mumford and Sons started blasting in the speakers, and Carlton groaned. 

“Turn it off, Spencer!” he yelled over the music.

“I can’t hear you, Lassie! The music’s too loud! ‘Well I came home, like a stone, and I fell heavy into your arms!’” he half shouted, half sung the lyrics. Carlton rolled his eyes and accepted his fate. The rest of the ride was spent with music being played too loud, and Carlton would never admit that he quietly sang along.

When they finally arrived in Las Vegas, they were both singing whole-heartedly to Bohemian Rhapsody. Carlton pulled up to the hotel they had booked a room in and parked the car. Before either of them got out, Carlton turned to look at Spencer. Shawn. Whatever

“Look, whatever’s going on between us, we should put it on hold while we’re here, okay?”

Spencer — no, Shawn — nodded, the usual glee in his face replaced with actual seriousness for once. “Of course. Just...why?”

“I just want to keep this trip professional. We’re here to catch Despereaux, and nothing else. If we want to go on vacation, we’ll do that another time.”

Shawn grinned at that. “You’d go on vacation with me?”

Carlton rolled his eyes and got out of the car without answering.

They set up their stuff in the room they were sharing, which thankfully had two beds, before heading to the local museum, from which there were reports that art had been stolen. Each night for the past week, another piece of art had been stolen. Most of them were paintings, but the most recent one was an ancient relic that had indecipherable symbols on it.

Carlton walked into the museum and flashed his badge at the woman working at the front desk. She had dark brown eyes and even darker hair. "SBPD, here to talk to the person who runs this place?" He looked around the room. There were a few paintings hung up on the walls, which were a warm wood color with swirls of amber.

The woman at the desk smiled. "Ah, we've been expecting you. Right this way." She got up and led them down a few halls. "My name's Lisa, by the way," she said as she walked. 

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Lisa," Shawn said with a flirtatious smile. "I'm Shawn Spencer."

Carlton glared at Shawn and "accidentally" stepped on his foot. Hard.

"Ow! Lassie, what was that for?!"

Carlton just shook his head and rolled his eyes as they followed Lisa. They finally stopped and went into a room where there were about eight monitors showing camera feeds. 

"Hey by the way, do you guys know the feds that showed up here a little while ago?" Lisa asked.

"Feds?" Carlton asked.

She nodded. "They came and started asking all these weird questions about bad smells and flickering lights or something."

Carlton and Shawn shared an equally confused look before Carlton said, "We don't know any feds."

"That's alright. Anyways, this was captured on last night's feed, and it's the only time we've actually managed to catch the thief on screen." She played a recording of the security.

A figure in a black leather jacket snuck around the room, occasionally stopping to examine a piece of art. He didn't take anything for the entire time he was in view of the camera. He only looked.

Lisa stopped the video and turned to Carlton and Shawn. "That's it. We don't have anything else other than that."

Shawn squinted at the screen. "Go back about ten seconds."

She turned back to the screen and did as he asked. Carlton watched the screen for what Shawn might've seen. 

"There! Pause it!"

With the video paused, Shawn bent closer to the screen and zoomed it in. It was the only moment that he turned to face the screen. His eyes looked completely black.

"Could just be the shadows," Carlton said.

Shawn shook his head. "No, the light's in the wrong place for his eyes to be shadowed like that. Either he's wearing black eye contacts, or he's a—"

"I swear to all things holy, if you say demon, I will literally punch you in the face, Spencer."

Spencer seemed to reconsider his words. "Fine. Contacts it is, then." He rolled his eyes.

Lisa chuckled at their bantering. "You sound like an old married couple."

Carlton's face went blank as he stared at her. "Wh-what?"

Her smile faded. "Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to offend you or anything—"

Spencer cut in at that point with a cheeky grin. "Don't worry, he's not offended. He's just shocked you could tell that we're lovers in the night."

Carlton started sputtering as his face turned red. "We — Shawn! — we aren't — that's not—"

Spencer started laughing, and Lisa hesitantly joined in. Carlton shot a glare at Shawn.

"Not funny, Spencer," he growled.

"Oh, it was plenty funny to me! Anyways." He turned back to Lisa, his face taking on a serious facade again — a facade that Carlton jcould see right through, but apparently Lisa couldn't. "The man in the video actually happens to be an old friend of mine—"

"You two are anything _but_ friends, Spencer."

Shawn gave Carlton a wounded look. "I think I can decide who my friends are, thank you very much, and if you keep _that_ attitude up, you won't be considered one anymore."

"The man is an art thief!"

"Yeah! One of the coolest professions in the world! He's like a real life Neal Caffrey!"

Carlton saw Lisa shift out of the corner of his eye, and he immediately closed his mouth, stopping himself from saying his next retort. He glared at Shawn, as if to say, 'We'll finish this later,' even though he knew they wouldn't. No matter how much he pretended to dislike Shawn, he actually enjoyed their arguments. 

"We should get going," he said aloud. He looked at Lisa. "Thank you for your time." 

She beamed and nodded. "Anytime!"

After they got back to their hotel, a black car lurked outside in the shadows, where no one would be able to see it. In the car were two men. The driver turned toward the one in the passenger seat.

"There's definitely something up with them," the driver said.

The passenger nodded. "Yeah, who would willingly go to McDonald's? Everyone knows that place is _seriously_ unhealthy."

"Dude, their burgers are _amazing_."

"Uh-huh, sure."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know this chapter kind of ended suddenly but I was having trouble coming up with what's next. Hopefully the next chapter will have more action and get into the storyline more!


End file.
